Responsibility Reflects Character

As I read the latest news regarding the BP oil spill, I was reminded once again about this important subject of accepting responsibility.

BP confirmed that Tony Hayward will step down on Oct. 1 as the company seeks to reassure both the public and investors that it is taking responsibility for the spill and is learning lessons from this major disaster.

“BP will change as a result of this accident,” BP Chairman Carl-Henric Svanberg told investors.” We are taking a hard look at ourselves, what we do and how we do it. What we learn will have implications for our ways of working, our strategy, and our governance.”

Whatever your personal views are about the oil spill, please know that I’m not writing to defend or attack BP. I’m simply offering this current event as a way to illustrate what accepting responsibility looks like and why it’s in your best interest to do so.

It doesn’t matter whether we’re talking about a national disaster like the Gulf oil spill or a personal blunder like losing your temper; the process of accepting responsibility for your action is the same.

Accepting responsibility for your actions and decisions will help you earn the trust, respect, and confidence of others as well as improve your self-image.

Sadly, accepting full responsibility for one’s decisions and actions is becoming a rarity. The good news is that those who do will stand out from the crowd.

Whose Fault Is It?

How we handle responsibility for our decisions as well as our mistakes is a direct reflection on our character. It’s wrong to think that we’re fooling anyone when we project blame onto someone or something else instead of a being accountable for our actions or decisions. People are smarter than that. They can tell when we’re shirking our responsibilities, and they find it extremely distasteful.

  • Blaming Others

It’s easy to see early on in life who has it right and who hasn’t. Consider the Little League player who always blames the team’s loss on the coaches, the umpires, and the other players. Or how the young professional with a poor performance record insists every time that it’s because of something beyond her control.

  • Accepting Responsibility

At the other end of the spectrum, you’ve probably also witnessed or heard about the positive side. Like a group of boys confessing to the neighbor that they broke his window rather than running away. Or the husband who humbles himself before his wife and children and apologizes after having been unnecessarily short with them.

Universally, people who accept responsibility for their actions command greater respect and influence. By contrast, those who pass the buck or make excuses eventually lose the trust and confidence of others.

In addition to reflecting character, accepting responsibility is one of the most critical factors in leadership. No one wants to follow leaders who attempt to pass the buck or who don’t accept responsibility for their mistakes or errors in judgment.

In my own life, I make every effort to always accept full responsibility for my decisions—both good and bad. Doing so has played a critical role in helping me make better decisions. I believe this is because when you hold yourself accountable for your mistakes, you learn important lessons from those painful experiences that help you avoid making the same mistake or bad decision again.

Three Keys to Accepting Responsibility

As a foundation for considering the essential elements of accepting responsibility, let’s break out what BP Chairman Carl-Henric Svanberg said:

1. Self-Examination

We are taking a hard look at ourselves, what we do and how we do it.”

The first step in accepting responsibility is to reflect on your action or decision. Before you can make anything right or apologize for a mistake, you have to have a clear understanding of where you went wrong.

2. Learning

“What we learn will have implications for our ways of working, our strategy, and our governance.”

Once you have a clear idea of what went wrong, you must ask yourself what you learned as a result. If you experience a success, what led to it and how can you capitalize on this knowledge in the future? If you made a mistake, what kinds of actions or thinking got you into hot water? Are your priorities in the right order? Is your focus in the right place?

3. Change

“BP will change as a result of this accident.”

Self-examination and learning by themselves are not enough. If we are serious about becoming someone who accepts responsibility for our actions and desire the benefits that come with it, we must also commit to and follow through with change. Continue what’s working and change what isn’t.

A Good Place to Start

I want to strongly encourage you to commit from this point forward to accept 100% responsibility for your actions and decisions? If you’re wondering where to start, here are some areas I believe are essential:

  • Accept responsibility for where you find yourself today.
  • Accept responsibility for the state of your marriage.
  • Accept responsibility for your children.
  • Accept responsibility for the state of your other relationships.

If you aspire to be a leader in your personal and professional life, begin by accepting full responsibility for everything you undertake and never pass the buck when things go wrong.

About the Author: Todd Smith is a successful entrepreneur of 30 years and founder of Little Things Matter. To receive Todd’s daily lessons, subscribe here. All Todd’s lessons are also available on iTunes as downloadable podcasts. (Todd’s podcasts are ranked #27 in America’s top 100 podcasts and #1 in the personal and development field.)

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  • Khandi
    Dear Mr. Smith

    Firstly, thank you for sharing on the many relevant topics which play a pivotal role in my life!

    During the course of my life, I have practised doing some level of self-evaluation with the aim to be a better person (not just for myself but also to serve others). I have been inspired, encouraged and educated as a result of the issues you have penned.

    In relationship to the abovementioned topic, I have had to take a more diligent look at my life - my decisions and my actions. Despite the external factors which have influenced my decisions and actions (good and bad), I have come to humbly accept that I am SOLEY RESPONSIBLE for them! With that knowledge, I shall continue on the path for self-improvement - seeking help from others where necessary, as I am not all-knowing).

    Once again, thank you for taking the time to share so that other lives may be positively impacted. Kudos to you sir!

    God bless you!

    Khandi
  • Khandi,

    You are a special person! I admire your humility and authenticity. You also have a gift of communication.

    I wish you the very best on your journeys!

    Todd
  • Hi Todd,

    great post as usual. Whether we accept 100 % responsibility for our decisions or not - we have it. So we might as well accept it. Refusing to accept it only leads to struggle, a whole life long.

    Thanks for sharing

    Oliver
  • Eightwomendream
    I think with responsibility also comes a dose of not judging others. I have seen people judge people for a behavior they exhibit themselves. So responsibility means judging ourselves before we point out some perceived flaw in someone else. But I do see that sometimes people run from responsibility when they are completely overwhelmed and feel helpless to change their circumstances.
  • I agree we should always strive not to judge others. Question: When do you believe a person crosses the line from noticing the things a person does to judging them? I would value knowing your answer.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    Todd
  • When it is time for me to accept responsibilty for something, instead of telling someone "Sorry", I find saying "I was wrong" has more meaning....for both of us.

    I wonder if BP can say that?
  • Interesting! I like it. I may need to include in my book. I love new ideas!
  • Hazel
    Really enjoyed todays advice just have to put it into practice now.....
  • Hazel- Thanks for your comment. Just focus on making small improvements each day! It's the small things compounded over time that make the difference. Todd
  • Hello Todd,
    This is a lesson that leaders must be willing to own up to daily.

    When things go wrong as they often do, the easy way out is to begin playing the blame game. I tend to find that the champion players like to hide in the mirror. So whenever I find the urge to play this game, this is the person I prefer to play with.

    Throughout history those who fail to learn from mistakes made are doomed to repeat them. I myself enjoy making new mistakes and failing forward instead of getting trapped in an endless loop of redundancy.

    Still Looking In,
    Kevin J. Kilroy
  • Kevin- I always look forward to reading your comments. Thanks for being a loyal contributor. Todd
  • Another great piece.
    Thank you
  • Thanks Ernesto!
  • Another good, hard lesson....
  • Coming from you James, that means a lot. You always seem to respond to the challenging ones. If I recall your last comment was, "Thanks for the kick in the teeth" on my post "What's in Your Rulebook?" :-) Take care buddy!
  • DavidCookPottery
    Try to get all the typos. Sorry I missed some in the last post.
  • DavidCookPottery
    33 years ago I worked as a collector for a credit company. I learned the Three "P's" you don't make loans to: (these are tragic, and apologies already to those of integrity that work in these fields) Painters, because you don't know where they will be tomorrow (to collect from), Policemen because they feel they can get by with anything they want to, and Preacher 'cause you can't trust what they say.

    People usually chuckle over the last one. I don't find it a bit funny. Not one bit. I decided then and there that THIS would be ONE BELIEVER whose word you could LITERALLY take to the Bank. And for 33 years I have worked to be a man of intgrity on this Good Earth. My credit history is spotless. I AM responsible, keep my promises, take responsibility for my ills and sins, learn from my mistakes (try to, really do) and then make the changes I need to make to make life better. That is something, one little thing that really becomes a BIG thing over time, that every single one of us can so.

    Blessings,
    Dr. David A. Cook
    Salisbury, NC
    8.4.2010
  • Look at you go David! If you pursue the next chapter of your life with the same vigor in which you typed this message, you will achieve great things. I can't wait. Todd
  • Absolutely, there is no character without accepting responsibility for one's action and not taking corrective action.
  • Amer- Thanks for your contribution! Todd
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